Episode 67

#67. The Two Banana/Turkey Plan

Cake & Cookies. The Robb & Katie Show

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So, um, I bought the mushrooms.

I bought the Swiss cheese.

And I did not buy torta rolls.

I bought potato rolls.

Ooh.

Oh, and they're going to soak up all the juices?

Yeah, I like it better that way.

Mm-hmm.

summer's full of reasons to look your best. Tecovis Western boots are handcrafted in over 200 steps with premium cowhide and exotic leathers, and they're comfortable right out of the box. No break-in period, just boots you can wear all summer long. Their performance shirting and premium denim keep you cool and put together wherever the season takes you. And of course, you can always stop by tecovis.com. Tecovis. Forever West. Back to school is busy enough. The last thing you need is shopping that makes it harder. Whether you're moving into a dorm, your first apartment, or just getting organized for the semester, Wayfair makes it easy to get everything you need in one place. Furniture, bedding, storage, decor, study essentials, all at prices you'll love with fast shipping before move-in day. Get everything you need for back-to-school season. Shop Wayfair.com today. Wayfair, every style, every home. Hi, Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile. Are you looking for a beach read this summer? May I suggest your big wireless bill? It's got suspense, mystery, a slightly flat emotional arc, and a shocking twist where you realize you've been overpaying the entire time. Fortunately, though, Mint's story is better. Every plan, $15 a month. Even unlimited. That's it. Happy ending. Zero tears. Give it a try at mintmobile.com slash switch. Upfront payment of $45 for three months, $90 for six months, or $180 for 12-month plan required. $15 per month equivalent. Taxes and fees extra. Initial plan term only. Greater than 50 gigabytes. May slow when network is busy. See terms. My electric bill keeps creeping up every month this summer. You know what, Mike? We hear that from Florida homeowners all the time. Renewal by Anderson's energy-efficient replacement windows can help reduce heat transfer, improving comfort, and lowering energy costs. Nice. And you've got some end-of-the-summer savings happening? That's right. This month only. Buy four windows or doors and get the fifth free, plus 12-month special financing. Just go to bestwindowsflorida.com to schedule your free in-home design consultation to claim these savings. Restrictions apply. License number CGC 1527613. So, um, I bought the mushrooms. I bought the Swiss cheese. And I did not buy torta rolls. I bought potato rolls. Ooh. Oh, and they're going to soak up all the juices? Yeah, I like it better that way. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Do you know what's going to happen at about 630? Your dogs are going to start howling because they're going to know. And also, when I start cutting the mushrooms up, I bought an egg slicer, but you can use it on mushrooms. Oh, perfect for mushrooms. But when I start doing stuff like that, Linus gets very interested. Hey, Dad. Hey, Dad. Hey, hey, hey. What are you doing? Going to drop something? Going to drop something. Hey, Dad. What are you doing? Does it involve meat and cheese, my two favorite things? Mm. Mm. I'll say, son, it's a cheeseburger. He says, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God. That's my second favorite thing melted on my first favorite thing. Oh, my God. Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Just drop one. Just thinking about it. I think the lipstick's going to come out. Don't say that word. It's a horrible word. I'm sorry. He did have that unfortunate reaction the first time we gave him dog ice cream. Yeah, he really liked it. And listen, I love food, too, but that's never happened. All right, maybe once. Maybe once. But to be fair, it was really good. With that most unfortunate image in your mind. Are you ready to start? All right, do let's do. Mike O'Meara, Radio Entertainment. Hey there. This is Katie with the very hateful thought of the day. I hate impatience. I hate impatience. Not the flowers. The noun. People who honk horns the moment a light turns green. Jerks who huff and puff in line at the pharmacy. Obnoxious, insensitive people who lose their minds when a meal isn't served as quickly as they want. Really should take a chill pill. Commonly known as Xanax. Come on, folks. We're all in this together. And getting your underoos all twisted won't make anything go faster. Oprah said it before. Everybody poops. And I'm here to tell you that sometimes you've got to wait in line. I hate people with ants in their pants. And you. I hate you too. The flower is impatience though, isn't it? Yes. No tea at the end. No. No. But if my diction was a little off, you know, you needed to make that clarification. I understand. I need to help Judd real fast. He seems to have frightened himself with the curtain. Okay. You go do that. I'll get the show started. Okay. Don't forget the opening. I got nothing but time here. I won't be impatient. Okay. It is cake and cookies. Yes. Well, right now it's just cake. But we've been away a while and we are back. We apologize. Katie had some sore throat issues and we wanted to make sure her voice was sweet as can be. And speaking of sweet voices, oh, I've missed this guy. Cake and cookies. Rob and Katie. It's the Rob and Katie show. Hey, look who's back. It's Cookie. Hey, Cake. Hi, Cookie. We have many kinds of cookies in the house today. Because Robert likes the kind of cookies that you get at the bakery section of the grocer that are frosted. Oh. Those are okay. Yeah, they're okay. I'm a big fan of the, it's just like it's a very soft sugar cookie with a lot of icing on it. It's very sweet. They're kind of cake-like and that's not my bag. That's not your scene, I know. So what I like are you go to Costco and you get a container that has oatmeal, chocolate chip, and white chocolate macadamia cookies. Like maybe eight of each. Now those are fantastic. Did you like thank everybody and stuff? I'm going to do it there in a second, but I wanted you to be here for that and that's why I'm on my cookie riff now. Okay. And then yesterday you saw, of course, the lemon cookies that I bought sort of as an, it was an impulse buy because there was a lemon display at the front of the giant store. Like real lemons or just lemon cookies? No, lemon things. They have like a limoncello thing series and so they had like lemon salsa something, I don't know, lemon cookies. They had lemon seltzer water. Also, very yellow thing. I like lemons. I do. Oh, love lemons. I do. Hold on. I need to take a chapstick break. Oh, okay. And I know why. But my lips hurt real bad. So welcome everybody to the Cake and the Cookies program. I'm Rob Spiewak along with Katie Forbes Von Herman. And I'd like to say thank you to Mike O'Meara and to Oscar Santana and to Matt Bloom who was so instrumental in getting this show on the internet each and every time we record. Steve Bridges used to run it on his radio show. On his radio show. Steve Bridges used to run it on his radio station. There you go. Although if we asked him, he'd probably put it on his morning show and he'd just take a break. Why not? I'll be back in 70 minutes. Go ahead and play. He's been at it for 50 years? He's been at it for a million years. Yeah. I know. I think 50 is right. I think that's about right. Here's the thing. We, uh... What the hell? What is going on over there? There are really mean birds that have been dive bombing, Presley and Judd. Yeah, but are they inside now, Presley and Judd? No, no. That's outside. Yeah, but are they inside now? So the dogs are safe now. No, the dogs are outside. Oh, and so they're being murdered right now. Well, the... I don't know if the birds have hurt them. But they're definitely pissing them off. Oh! You know what they might be? Cat birds. Ironically titled. Our house is in a tizzy. The whole house is in an uproar? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because Judd can't sleep at night. He's very... Well, he's focused on the task at hand. He's laser focused, that boy. See, the thing is, and I'm not saying what direction I'm leading in, but sometimes when people have extraordinary focus, it is because they don't have the mental capacity to multitask. He's a sweet boy. Yes, he's very strong. Yes. Like my son. I know. And so I think... Your human son, not your furry. No, no, not the other one. Not my furry boy. So maybe because Judd maybe... Let's just say Judd and Presley were to play chess. Yes. Presley would probably win. Paws down. Yeah. If they were to go to a trivia night, you want to be on Presley's team. Yes. So Judd is singularly focused on that, and it's preventing him from sleeping. Yeah, he's been waking up 3 o'clock, 4 o'clock, 5 o'clock. That's not great. No. So how are you dealing with that? Judd, hop up. Judd, no. So he sleeps in the bed with you and Dan, and Presley does too. Yes. So 3.30 happens, and he gets up. Does he jump out of the bed? He hops right... Because he sleeps at the end of the bed. Sure, at the foot of the bed. The foot of the bed, facing out, I think, for protection purposes. Yeah, you know, they say that. The dogs say that. That's why Linus picks the weirdest spot, I think, to sleep in our house. Doesn't he go right between you two? Well, he panics if, like, I'm in the basement, and carries it at her computer, and the kids are in the bedrooms. Oh, no. Everyone has to be... What he does is then he will lay down... Dad. ...in the middle of the living room, where I think he feels he's equidistant from everybody. Dad, I don't like it when we're apart. No, he doesn't like it. I'd have a pack. Gotta get my pack together. Everybody in one room, please. Can't go to bed. So, yeah, so he's protecting you, but then 3.30 comes and he's out of the bed? Hops right down. And? Starts knocking on the door. With his snoot? No, he does it with his paw. Well, that's smart. Well, Presley taught it to him. She's a helper. Linus is bad with doors, because we have double doors, or as the German call them, doppel doors. Doppel doors. That lead into our bedroom, and we'll usually leave them cracked, because, you know, they just can be pushed in at any time, unless I put the lock up top. Right. So, Linus will go to leave, and he'll try to use his snoot to open the door, but all he does is close it. Close it. Yeah, and then he looks back, and he doesn't smile. He's pissed, and then you have to help him out. But he can knock with his paw. Yes. Presley, we kind of taught her how to do that when she was getting potty trained. Sure, it's an indicator. To let us know, because otherwise she would just go sit at the door quietly, and we'd never know. Do you want to hear something that'll make you crazy? Well... The Chubbix dog has been trained. They have a bell on their front door handle. Oh, we can't do that, because... And when the dog wants to go outside, when Finn wants to go outside, he literally rings the bell. We can't do that. Why? Because Presley takes advantage of... Once we taught her how to knock on the door, she started banging on anything that she wanted. So, you've seen her. You know how she, like, will bang and spin her bowl when she feels it's time to eat? Yeah, that Ricky Martin song's about her. Yes. She bangs. And now that she's started drinking out of the toilet, if the lid is closed... Is that still a thing? Oh, that's still a thing. The wet turban's not going away. Ugh. Yuck. She will walk past two bowls of water to get to the bathroom, and if the lid is closed, she will push on it until someone comes and lifts it up for her. So, why does she like the toilet water so bad? Is it, like, adventure drinking? Ever. I mean, is... No, did she? Wait. Can you hear them barking? I can't. It's not coming through. Okay, good. Um, good. Because Dan just... What? Now, Dan is... He's yelling for them, but he's trying to do it in my voice. Oh, hold on. Really? Put on the emergency brake. I know. That says to me Dan has been actually working on an impression of you? No, no. Here's the thing. Yes? So, I told you we had... I told you about taking the dogs to training. Yeah. And we were supposed to come up with, for lack of a better term, a safe word. And isn't it... I can say it because they won't hear

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